Tag Archives: Lindsay Lohan

Tiger Blood and Super Liar join Forces for Scary Movie 5 (Trailer)

The only reason I want to see this is because it may be Lindsay Lohan’s last movie. Kind of like a post-mortem thing. Or maybe on the bright side it will be the last movie before she goes to jail. Either way I want to see the INCREDIBAD acting skills of Lilo as she tries to act like she gives a f**k about acting.

And being with Charlie Sheen.

I still don’t know why she refused to kiss our favorite crack wizard. Perhaps she was afraid she might get healthy. After all, Sheen must be doing something pretty amazing to stay alive this long. Or perhaps her lips have just gone numb after years of sucking on a meth pipe. Either way she’d be lucky cause no one else would touch her, even, under contract.

Back to Scary Movie 5.

I am loving the cheese, humor, mocking and slapstick of this Scary Movie, so enjoy this. Happy holidays. I hope this makes you giggle like it did me;

Lindsay Lohan Available for Weddings/Bar Mitzvahs?! #YourEvent #hellno

lindsay-lohan-drunk-221

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

My favorite poster girl for AA has become a commodity and is selling her soul…I mean herself….I mean is AVAILABLE for weddings and bar mitzvahs.

According to new news surfacing on the NYPostDaily.com her management, 123Talent.com, says she available for your party now!

Check out this screenshot;

lindsay_lohan_pr--300x300

Who knew Lindsay is a fashion designer and recording artist. I thought she was Miss body shots 2012. I have much to learn about our redheaded friend. I would think Lindsay at a wedding would be an awesome ear bleeding wedding singer. Maybe she could recite Hebrew at your Bar mitzvah wearing a prison issued yarmulke. Garsh that sounds like fun.

I guess with a huge debt to the IRS and a storage locker full of stuff she hasn’t paid for she NEEDS the money. Oh that, and her 12 packs a day cigarette habit she washes down with booze and meth.

Will you be booking Lilo for your next event? Yeah, I didn’t think so.

And the Beat Goes On, This Time With LiLo #Fight #Drunk

Oh Lindsay darling. You are ALWAYS my favorite hot mess. The day you die millions of bloggers will cry for lack of material. In the meantime I still have you so…..

 

Turns out Lilo got her ‘beat down’ on, and went to JAIL for once.

Lindsay went to the Justin Bieber concert with her sister Ali , not to see Bieber, but the up and coming boy band ‘The Wanted’. The lead singer Max George is a hot piece, and English making him extra nom to American Girls. And Lindsay wants him bad.

Sigh, He is just dreamy. Be still my beating groin.

Lindz and met up with him and the and Max’s mates at a hotel bar and then headed to the Avenue nightclub. There, Lindsay started drinking like only a Lohan can. As the night progressed Max was not having it so he ignored her drunk ass.

Max became interested in talking with another girl (duh Lindz!), a married tourist named Tiffany Mitchell. Lindsay got her temper freak on, and she punched the other girl in the face.

Oh, snap. That was the ticket because Lindsay then ended up with the police for a midnight date. Charges were pressed for assault and battery. Max George won and ended up with some OTHER chick and left a groupie and one drunk redheaded groupie at the bar to sort out their drunk bitch fight.

According to Zap2it.com;

Dina Lohan did meet Lindsay immediately after she was released from custody. Lohan has been charged with third-degree assault.

 

Poor kid is a hot mess and needs some 5150 in her life. For my international readers that’s a 72 hour mental health lock down in America. Cuffs and all. Looks like Lohan is headed to jail for real this time. You don’t walk away and have a martini after 3rd degree assault charges.

Here’s hoping she gets it together, OR makes it through the year. I’d be happy with either one.

Lindsay Lohan Going Back to Jail Thanks to Her Assistant?

Personal Assistant’s in Hollywood are hard to find. A good one that is. Lindsay Lohan, my favorite train wreck, just found this out the hard way.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Poor Lindz can’t get a break from the justice system. Then again why should she after creating this hot mess on PCH?

Turns out our Lilo was lying…again. Gavin, Lindsay’s personal assistant was interviewed by the Santa Monica Police Department after Lindsay’s Porsche hit the back of a truck on PCH. While she was being treated for the incident in the Hospital for the incident, GAVIN told them he was riding shotgun and it WAS her fault. Obviously Gavin is NOT getting paid enough.

TMZ.com posted;

Lindsay told cops she was a passenger in her Porsche, but authorities don’t believe her and she will be charged with the crime of lying to cops.

Read more: http://www.tmz.com/2012/11/07/lindsay-lohan-assistant-police-cops-lied-pch-accident/#ixzz2BZrxBAnW

There goes another movie contract. I guess Lindsay will be shooting from a holding cell from now on. Thoughts? Think it will stick this time or will this redheaded hot mess walk?

Charlie Sheen Thinks Lindsay Lohan is a Mess…..and He’s Right! #ScaryMovie5 Drama

When will Lohan learn to bring forth her wizardry and tiger’s blood? It better be soon because even Charlie Sheen is shaking his head at this mess.
Recently Lohan was hired to shoot ‘Scary Movie 5’. However although shooting has begun Lohan has been absent with ‘walking pneumonia’.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Really Lohan? Only if walking pneumonia means meth addiction hunny.

She claims she wasn’t in the script for the scene they were shooting. Seem’s that Lohan has been absentee from the beginning and wouldn’t participate in anything.

“Lindsay missed every meeting she had for the film, including script reads and wardrobe meetings. Then she missed her flight to Atlanta on Sunday to shoot the movie. The producers had been getting signs Friday that she was a mess, and would not be fit to work. She is under contract — so to get out of it, she had to prove that she was sick. She tried to prove she has walking pneumonia. She’s been locked up in her room at the Bowery Hotel. She’s been in a tailspin. Even Charlie Sheen worried she might not be able to do the scene.”

Lohan my dear you have a REAL problem. Like heading for dead problem. If Charlie Sheen is worried you know it’s bad.

Seems’ also there is a scene where she and Tiger Blood (Sheen) kiss and she refuses to do that as well. I hate to be the one to cue her into reality but Charlie Sheen sans his fake teeth look better than she does right now.

I say they should just shoot it as a reality show and call it ‘Scary Movie 5 – the Sheen/Lohan saga’.

I’d watch it.

 

Lindsay Lohan Needs a Bra and Shops, etc.

Look at this. What does it remind you of?

 

Nope it isn’t a circus freekshow performer (they have class), but it is lovely Lindsay Lohan and her boobies swaying in the wind.

Check it;

 

Yup. It’s our ever lovely ginge LiLo shopping in Venice wearing not-a-bra.

I feel like I am looking at someones auntie from a backwards po-dunk town with fake Chanel knock off glasses sucking on her chick stick, with way to much side boob showing. Or maybe a long-lost relative of Kim “Tardy for the Party” Zolciak.

Either way Lindsay tried to balance it out by bringing a slightly curvier than her friend, with her. This too was a FAIL because she rocked her flower dress, scarf and chick stick, making LiLo look trashier.

When will Lindsay learn? Looking like your drank a 40 and sucked down a carton of Pall Mall’s isn’t pretty. I’m wondering why her friend isn’t helping her get her cute on.

In the meantime this discerning fashionista asks only one thing. Lindsay please head straight to Agent Provocateur and go binge on lingerie like you do on drugs and alcohol. If you are going to be spending money you don’t have, make it count baby!

Lilo and Sheen Sign for Scary Movie 5. Holy Hell, the Apocalypse/Rapture is Upon Us!

(Photo straight stolen from Michael K and crew at Dlisted.com because it is too good not to share http://dlisted.com/)

According the lovely people at E! Charlie Sheen is back for another romp in the scary movie series. This should be interesting with his ‘Tiger Blood’ on set, i.e. crackhead craziness.

Wait there is more, Lovely Lindsay Lohan aka LiLo has signed on too. Oh…Em…Gee….Fuckballs. This is beyond interesting. I expect this to be ….HIGH-larious. Imagine the Wizard and Queen of drug addiction together. What kind of insurance do you need for that kind of movie? Holy bejesus!

As far as Lohan she once again, or should I say notoriously, has NOT signed a contract yet. So um, is she in it?

Her rep said that, “as of right this moment,” she had not inked a deal, but all insiders are in agreement that she is definitely doing the movie.

Sources also say that the ever-comebacking Charlie Sheen, despite being uncomfortably killed off in Scary Movie 4, will be back for the next sequel, which is being touted as a complete reboot of the franchise and is due in theaters Jan. 11, 2013.

http://www.eonline.com/news/335474/lindsay-lohan-set-for-scary-movie-5-with-charlie-sheen

Oh eff me, really. This is like all the other movies Lindsay says she is in. They want her but she is even HIGH-er risk than Sheen who at least has a REAL career backing him up. Maybe he can use his magic Wizard powers to push this through because it will be a must-see movie.

Lets hope neither one OD’s or dies half way through shooting I kind of want to see this made.

Sigh, that’s Hollywood.

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